This page is general health information, not medical advice. It cannot tell you whether you have an infection. A clinician can, and the testing options on this site are a good place to start.

Learning that you have a sexually transmitted infection can bring up a lot at once. Many people find that the next question is harder than the test itself: how do you tell someone?

This guide covers how to tell someone about an STD in a calm, practical way. It also explains how partner notification for STDs works, and what expedited partner therapy means for people in Dallas and across Texas.

STDs are common, and talking about them is a normal part of caring for your health and your partner's health. Nothing here is about blame.

Why partners need to know

A partner may have no symptoms and still carry an infection. Many STIs cause few or no symptoms, according to the CDC. That means a partner often has no way of knowing unless someone tells them.

The CDC STI Treatment Guidelines (2021) advise that recent sex partners be evaluated and, when appropriate, treated. One reason is that a treated person can be reinfected by a partner who was never treated. Telling a partner helps both of you.

Dallas County has a lot of STI activity. The Texas Department of State Health Services (DSHS) reported 22,073 chlamydia cases and 10,696 gonorrhea cases in Dallas County in 2022. That is a rate of 848.7 and 411.3 per 100,000 people. These are common infections, and many people in this city are having the same conversation you are.

What you need before you start

You do not need much. A little preparation makes the conversation easier.

Your test result or your clinician's notes. Know which infection you were told about, and whether it is treatable or manageable.
A few facts from the CDC. The CDC's STI pages explain each infection in plain language. You can point your partner to them.
A private, unhurried place. Choose somewhere you can both speak freely and neither of you has to rush.
A short script. One is below. Writing your own version in advance can help.
A list of where to get tested. Have a clinic ready so your partner has a next step. The Dallas testing guide lists local options and what the clinics publish about cost.
Support for yourself. A friend, a counselor or a clinician can help you plan, or debrief afterward.

Step-by-step: how to tell your partner about an STD

Step 1: Get the facts from a clinician first

Before you talk, ask your clinician three things. What is the infection? Is it curable or manageable? What should my partners do?

The CDC says bacterial STIs and trichomoniasis are curable with treatment from a clinician. HIV, herpes and HPV are not curable, but they are treatable or manageable. Knowing which category applies helps you speak with confidence.

Ask your clinician how far back to count partners. This depends on the infection, so it is best to get that answer from them.

Step 2: Decide who needs to hear it

List the people you have had sex with recently, as your clinician advises. Start with the ones who are most likely to be affected. If a list feels overwhelming, begin with one name.

Step 3: Choose the right way to tell each person

In person is often best for an ongoing partner. A phone call or a private message can work for others, especially if distance or safety is a concern.

If you are worried about how someone might react, including any risk to your safety, tell your clinician. They can help you think through safer options. Some health departments also offer ways to notify partners without using your name. See the section on notification services below.

Step 4: Pick a calm moment

Avoid bringing it up right before or during sex, or when either of you is angry, intoxicated or about to leave. A private moment with some time to spare works better.

Step 5: Use a simple script

Short and clear works best. Here is one example you can change to fit your voice:

"I want to tell you something because I care about your health. I recently got tested and my results showed [infection]. It's something a clinician can [treat or help manage]. Since we've been together, I think you should get tested too. I can help you find a clinic in Dallas if that's useful."

Say what happened, say what a clinician can do, and offer a next step. You do not need to explain where it came from or who it came from.

Step 6: Give them room to react

Your partner may be quiet, upset, relieved or full of questions. All of that is normal. You can say, "Take the time you need. I'm happy to talk again later."

Try not to defend yourself or ask them to comfort you in the first minutes. If the talk becomes heated, it is fine to pause and come back to it.

Step 7: Point to testing and care

Encourage your partner to see a clinician, even if they feel fine. A clinician or test can tell them what is going on. You cannot tell by looking, and neither can they.

The CDC's GetTested locator at gettested.cdc.gov can help find testing sites. Dallas clinics are covered below.

Step 8: Follow your clinician's guidance on sex and follow-up

Ask your clinician when it is safe to have sex again. The answer depends on the infection and on whether you and your partner have both been treated. If you were prescribed treatment, take it as directed. Ask whether a follow-up test is recommended.

Tips that help

Lead with care, not apology. "I wanted you to know because I care about you" lands better than a long explanation.
Keep the focus on next steps. Testing and treatment are what matter now.
Write down what you want to say. It is easier to stay calm with notes in hand.
Respect their privacy. Do not share their health information with others.
Expect more than one conversation. Questions often come later.

Common mistakes to avoid

Waiting too long. The longer a partner goes without care, the more chance there is for reinfection or for the infection to spread.
Guessing who "gave" it. Many infections have no symptoms for a long time, and a test result rarely shows who or when. Blame usually does not help.
Telling a partner they are fine. Only a test and a clinician can say what is going on in someone else's body.
Telling them what to do about treatment. That is their clinician's role. You can only encourage them to go.
Handling it alone when safety is a concern. Ask a clinician about other ways to notify partners.

Partner notification services in Dallas

Some health departments offer to notify partners for you without sharing who they heard it from. This is often called partner notification. The pages published by Dallas County Health and Human Services (DCHHS) for its Sexual Health Clinic do not describe an anonymous notification service, so it is worth asking.

You can call the DCHHS Sexual Health Clinic at (214) 819-1819 and ask what help is available for telling partners. The phone line opens at 7:45 a.m. DSHS also notes that Texas requires clinicians and labs to report some infections, including chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis and HIV, to the health department. Ask your clinician how that applies to you.

Expedited partner therapy in Texas

Expedited partner therapy, often called EPT, is a way for a clinician to provide treatment to a patient's sex partner without first examining that partner. The CDC supports EPT in certain situations, and it is meant to help a partner get care sooner. It does not replace a full visit with a clinician.

According to the CDC's legal status page for Texas, there is no EPT statute in this state. The legal basis comes from administrative rules instead. Here is what those rules say:

A Texas Medical Board rule says a physician does not need an existing practitioner-patient relationship with a partner to prescribe STD medications for the partners of the physician's established patient (22 Tex. Admin. Code Sec. 190.8).
Advanced practice registered nurses (APRNs) may order or prescribe STD medications for partners of an established patient, though they are not required to (22 Tex. Admin. Code Sec. 222.4).
Pharmacists may dispense partner prescriptions without a physician-partner relationship, and the partner's name is not required on the label (22 Tex. Admin. Code Secs. 291.29 and 291.33).

The CDC's Texas entry refers to sexually transmitted diseases generally and does not limit EPT to specific infections. Whether EPT fits your situation is up to your clinician. Some infections need a partner to be examined or tested, and a clinician decides that. If you want to know whether EPT is an option for your partner, ask at your visit.

Free and low-cost testing in Dallas

Your partner may be looking for somewhere affordable to start. Here is what these Dallas organizations publish. Always check with the clinic about current availability and fees.

Sexual Health Clinic (Dallas County Health and Human Services), 2377 N. Stemmons Freeway, 1st Floor, Suite 100, (214) 819-1819. The county page lists testing for HIV, hepatitis C, syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, trichomoniasis and mpox, along with treatment for several infections. Appointments are required, and same-day or next-day appointments are offered. The page lists Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., and Wednesday from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. The county page lists no fees. People without symptoms who want routine testing are directed to the DCHHS Mobile Medical Unit.
Resource Center Health, 2603 Inwood Rd., 214.528.2336. The Resource Center's page lists confidential rapid HIV antibody, early HIV RNA and syphilis tests as free. Gonorrhea and chlamydia tests are free with a $40 office visit. Request an appointment online.
Prism Health North Texas, Oak Lawn Health Center, 2801 Lemmon Ave, Suite 200, 214-521-5191. Prism says it uses sliding fee rates based on household income and size, accepts Medicaid, Medicare, CHIP and most private insurance, and does not deny care based on ability to pay. Schedule in advance when you can.
Foremost Family Health Centers, Martin Luther King Jr Family Clinic, 2922-B MLK Jr Blvd, (214) 426-3645. The CDC GetTested listing says insurance, Medicaid, Medicare and a sliding scale are accepted.
Parkland Health, Southeast Dallas Health Center, 9202 Elam Rd, (214) 266-1600. The CDC GetTested listing shows a free HIV test and a sliding scale.
AHF Healthcare Center, 7777 Forest Ln Ste B 122, (972) 383-1060. The CDC GetTested listing shows a sliding scale and says no appointment is required.
Neighborhood Medical Center, 5917 Belt Line Rd, (972) 726-6464. The CDC GetTested listing shows a sliding scale and says no appointment is required.

If your partner is a teen, Texas Family Code Sec. 32.003 lets a minor of any age consent to diagnosis and treatment of reportable infectious diseases, including reportable STIs and HIV. The same law lets a physician tell a parent or guardian about the treatment. A provider may do so even if the minor does not agree, so it is best not to assume a visit will stay private.

What to expect afterward

Every conversation goes differently. Many people find that telling a partner is a relief, and that the talk is calmer than they feared. Some partners need time. Others respond with questions or concern.

Getting tested and, if a clinician prescribes it, treated can lower the chance of passing an infection back and forth. No method works for everyone, and a clinician can explain what makes sense for your situation. Many partners handle this news well, especially when it comes with care and a clear next step.

Where to go from here

You have done something responsible by reading this. Talk to a clinician about your own care and your partners, and pick a testing site from the list above. A Dallas clinic can answer questions about fees and appointments before you go.

How to Tell a Partner You Have an STD (and Expedited Partner Therapy in Texas)